Today is a good day:)

Today is a good day:)

I'm still in my pj's after four hours of work- haven't had time to
change! I was up with the sun this morning and called Amanda to wish
her a HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! This is a special treat because it costs so
much to call even locally so it was just a quick greeting:) I then
was planning to eat and write for an hour before my tutor, Ester, came
over but she was a bit early. So we chatted as I ate breakfast. We
usually eat together but she hasn't been feeling well lately. Her
story is pretty intense- she is in mid to late thirties and has two
children. Her first born is from her first 'husband' (culturally, if
you live with someone they are considered your husband). He was a
good man, good heart she says but after sometime he and her brother
got in a fight and the brother was killed. This angered the entire
family and she was outcast from them but her mother wouldn't let her
leave home. Her parents blamed her for her brother's death and she
tried to kill herself as a result. She was rushed to the hospital
after taking some pills and then had to stay at her mother's house as
she recovered. She wanted to leave again but knew it would add even
more shame to her mother so she relented in staying.

After some time, she snuck out at night to go to Grootfontein to look
for work. Once she had a job and was able to send money back to the
family she contacted her mom and all was fine. Eventually she met
another man and they started staying together and eventually moved to
Walvis Baai to look for new jobs. The son came along but this new
husband would beat him when Ester was away because he was lighter
skinned and not his own child. Ester didn't want to disturb the
husband so she and her son kept quiet and let it happen. When the man
started serving the boy toilet water, sleeping with the babysitter and
denying his HIV status to everyone, Ester decided it was finally time
to leave him. He told her she was a mad woman because she wouldn't
sleep with her husband but in reality they were both positive at this
point and she didn't want to get re-infected. The whole situation was
a mess, she finally moved back to Nkurenkuru, bringing the now HIV
positive babysitter with her and her two children and has been here
looking for work since 2006. She is part of one of the sewing
projects I'm helping out and is now my tutor. WHEW- that was my
breakfast story this morning- it has the potential to depress me but
it's one of thousands of stories I'm hearing everyday- and I get
strength from her. She works very hard, tries to care for her
children, and has a positive attitude. She said she has a home in
heaven and will not be sad when she dies. She is not scared of dying
but just wants to make sure her children are fine before she goes. It
is kind of twisted that she thinks she'll be dead in a year- that kind
of talk is hard to stomach but she doesn't even need ARV's at this
point so I'm hoping with the extra income from the sewing project and
the tutoring that she'll be able to afford not only school fees and
uniforms for her kids but also nutritious food for herself to stay
healthy.

In the middle of our lesson Anastasia visited and brought me enough
nongomene for the entire village! (It's the traditional bean that I
have a picture of in a bowl in an earlier post). It was a thank you
gesture because I went to her field Wednesday for some last minute
questions about her proposal for their sewing project. In the West
you would pick up the phone or send an email to ask a series of
questions that would take no more than 5 minutes but here I walked an
hour there and an hour back for that same convo:) But in the West you
wouldn't get a gifty for a 5 minute convo either so I dig the pay
off;) When she left Ester helped me clean the beans and taught me how
to cook them, we drank tea and she took off. Right then Ndadi had me
meet him to hand off a parcel before he left for a meeting so I rushed
out of the house, greeted him, visited the folks working in the garden
(yahooooooooo!!) and dropped Anastasia's proposal off at the Regional
Council. THEN I went to the post and received two cards from my
Grandma and a letter from my Grandpa. I read them under a tree and
had the biggest smile on the walk back home.


These are the things to live for I suppose- love from home,
traditional food gifty's, being a listening ear for someoneelse's
struggles….baby steps my friends, teeny tiny baby steps:)